So I have done it. I have got rid of Facebook. It is my first day since getting rid of it and I think it is actually quite weird. To go from checking Facebook every time I got a spare moment, or a wave of what I like to call ‘micro boredom ‘, to just quickly check up on my phone to nothing at all(!) is like a total, overnight, change in lifestyle. I have now been thee most Facebook free since before having it and it is actually one of those resonating feelings of superiority.
My reasons for getting rid of Facebook are 6 fold –
1. Status updates. How many times have you seen the shittiest status update on Facebook and thought – ‘that was so bad…SO BAD that I think I just got cancer.’ Stupid stuff like – “I’m eating toast with jam and butter” or “Just home” or something extra shit like “I <3 my gf”. Don’t even get me started on people with political opinions! Fuck! I have never seen arguments as heated as the arguments I have seen on Facebook and that, for me is a really BOLD statement as I come from one of the most dysfunctional families to have walked the Earth. Not to mention the amount of times people would share with their 712 friends that they had just failed their driving test…..I usually click the ‘Like’ function and the post a comment which states “hahahahahahhahahaahahaa!”
2. Random people. Ok, I met you at a party and I employed my more adorable, kind natured qualities. I spoke to you for all of five minutes, had a good chuckle – usually at other people’s expense – and then carried on with my life. This is not an invite for you to track me down on Facebook and then add me. I always thought that was stupid. It was creepy as well. I hardly know you and I don’t want to be one of several hundred people on your friends list that you don’t really know. We would not be the definition of friends….we are merely acquaintances. Imagine adding someone as a friend – a person you would like to keep in touch with – after having only spoken to them for a few minutes. ‘Well done, you are one of many douchebags that has more friends on Facebook than there are days in the year. Your classification befits a sad, sad, pathetic wanker.
3. Doppelganger week, the NSPCC cartoon thing, all the other stupid trends set by a bunch of knobs that have too much time on Facebook.
4. The fact people know EVERYTHING about you and you have never met them. That is beyond scary. It is just weird and it is borderline stalking!
5. The thing that annoys me most is the fakery on Facebook. People always seem so much more different on Facebook than they do for real. Also, those who set up two accounts so that ‘their family see one and their friends see them for real’……I’m sure I do not need to go into too much detail about my thoughts and estimations of people like that but, have no illusion, there are people that do that. You are the pinnacle of fake. I have very low estimations of you and virtually nothing to say. Sort your life out you insecure dick. Suck my balls.
6. The games people play – Farmville, Mob Wars, Millionaire City etc etc
Join me in the fuck Facebook campaign. Facebook is shit. You know it.
I have all my important people's numbers. That is and always will be the best way to keep in touch with my allies.
I have all my important people's numbers. That is and always will be the best way to keep in touch with my allies.
FUCK FACEBOOK!
Much love,
Jackson L.
No comments:
Post a Comment