I take it by now…as I am usually the last to find anything out, that you have heard about the change in the signs of the Zodiac? It is funny. I never really gave a shit about the whole Zodiac thing. Whenever I was board on some form of public transport I would search for the pages containing the puerile nonsense and observe with my tongue firmly in my cheek. I would then chuckle at how mundanely vague the entry for my day/week would be:
‘In your life things are going to happen causing stuff to unfold.’ Etc.
However, I must say now that I have looked into the dates of each star sign and realized that my Zodiac sign has indeed changed, I feel robbed. I am so used to saying I was a …..and reading the corresponding load of shit to compliment it. Now I have to change my ways and say and read different. It just feels very strange. It’s almost like I was born earlier.
Despite all this, I am going to carry on with my life as I have now, after writing the above, just realized I do not actually care to give a fuck. But, what I do find funny is that when the Astrologers are so hell bent trivializing the actual scientific research carried out to prove that the star signs were, after all, a load of shit. Scientific research stipulates that due to a wobble in the Earth’s axis over the last 2000+ years, the stars are viewed differently from Earth as they were when the Zodiac was drawn up. This is what causes the undeniable shift in the dates. Of course for the astrologers, they need to save their multi million dollar franchise of taking the utter piss out of people so they indeed come out and say Leos are still Leos and Tauruses are still a Taurus. Their argument is that the dynamics of astrology remains the same forever and the bigoted scientists cannot understand the spirituality behind it. This, for me, is just the weakest attempt at a plausible argument and an even weaker attempt at reverse psychology which will appeal to the masses, unfortunately. Everyone with half a brain knows that the universe is ever expanding. This means that certain structures within our universe will get further and further away which will, surely, alter the dynamics of astrology, no? Not to mention the fact that stars are considered a living entity. They have to ability to be born and die. So with that in mind…..do I really need to paint more of this picture?
Someone, please, do enlighten me as I am only trying to think logically.
The people I will be making fun of most will be those who whole heartedly followed it and believed pretty much EVERYTHING it had to offer. I will also laugh at you as well and continue to ridicule you to beyond the point of ‘too far’.
People who were like ‘Yeah man, I am like, totally not compatible and cannot get along with this person because he is like, you know….a Virgo and I am a total Cancer. I am Cancer personified, man! You know what I mean?!” And I’m standing there thinking, yeah. You totally are a cancer, a bottom feeder in a pile of shit that makes no REAL difference to anybodies life. Furthermore, look at that French football manager who would only play his star studded team, who actually had the potential of being a real force in the 2010 world cup, based on compatibility of star signs. What a fucking retard. Do people who write these astrology things realize just how much of an impact they are having on these people’s lives? I really don’t think they do. It is mind numbingly painful to think that some people can actually be so dumb!
The people who did annoy me the most though, were those who tried desperately to be something they just weren’t. People who I actually know…I personally know people who did this and I seriously considered my affiliation to them. They would try to adapt their personality traits to their star sign. I know what you’re thinking – “how much dicketry is actually in the world??” I know. I find myself asking the same question day in. I knew people who would claim they were laid back because they are Libran or very stubborn because they are Scorpios. No. I am stubborn. My father is stubborn and neither of us are Scorpios. My mother was an alleged Scorpio pre- Zodiac change and she was the least stubborn person in my family. My brother, a Libra, was the polar extreme of laid back and obscenely stubborn. So stubborn, in fact, that even lepers feel my pain. You are what you are because of how you react to certain situations. People can’t help the traits they have, although one can strive to make oneself a better person. It is 100% NOT determined by when you were born causing you to befall a certain sign in the Zodiac.
I was once asked by a friend who was trying to understand the energy between myself and an acquaintance and she was at her wits end. She asked what my sign was and asked “Do you think it is because you are a ….. and he is a …….? “
To which I replied
“No. I think it’s because I am a ….. and he is a TOTAL BELL END!”
Much love,
Jackson L.
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